Monday, January 18, 2010

Cause and Effect

The BBC website reports "Sex website row led to wife murder, Swansea trial told". Yet somehow I feel like the main cause of the gruesome murder was not that a woman had the temerity to question her husband's use of websites aimed at those trying to arrange casual sex encounters but instead the fact that he's a brutal homicidal misogynist criminal. No? I mean why doesn't it say "man's use of sex websites led to murder"? Because I'm pretty sure if he hadn't been on the sites, she wouldn't have asked about it. Do we really live in a world where a guy has a right to log on to sites seeking casual sex but a woman doesn't have the right to even question that behaviour? If anything "led to" Kirsty Grabham's appalling murder, you would have to say it is Paul Grabham's history of serious violence against her.

The article also claims that both partners "worked" as prostitutes. Then is says she had sex for money while he hung around in the background. He meanwhile sought casual sex and dogging on the internet and beat her up. I'm not sure I'd call him a prostitute. I think the word might be "pimp" here.

1 comment:


Ah Cruella you misunderstand - according to pro-prostitution propaganda,if a male works as a bouncer at a lapdancing club, he is apparently a 'sex worker.' Likewise if a male is a pimp he too is a 'prostitute!' Simple is it not - except it is not - because this woman-murderer, Paul Grabham was a pimp and John simultaneously.

But there we must always be sensitive to men's feelings even when such men have no connection whatsoever to the crimes Grabham has been charged with.

Another little gem - no you are wrong (sic) it is not women's right to challenge or criticise men's activities, sexual proclivities or even to criticise such behaviour. A woman's role is to be the man's slave, constantly boosting his fragile ego and being a willing sexual service station.

Asking the obvious question if Paul Grabham did not like Ms. Grabham's attitude why did not Paul Grabham leave? This is a question always levied at women who suffer extensive intimate male terrorism but never is the same question directed at men who murder their female partners.

But then patriarchy is never logical because there is always only one truth - and that is male-centered and male-defined truth which always benefits and maintains mens' power as a group, over women.