Monday, January 16, 2006

Big rise in casual sex

There has been a big rise in the number of people opting for casual sex, figures suggest.

The British Association of the Rampantly Horny recorded 22,041 one night stands carried out by its members last year - up 34.6% from 2004.

The figures show that the majority of casual sex continues to be carried out on by heterosexual - 19,601 procedures in 2005.

However, homosexual men and women now make up 11% of the total - up from just 8% in 2004.

This was recently illustrated by figures showing casual sex has enjoyed a surge in popularity among office workers in the City of London.

MOST POPULAR POSITIONS
Missionary: 5,655 (up 51.4%)
Her on top: 3,415 (up 50.2%)
“Doggy” style: 2,700 (up 9.3%)
Up against the wall: 2,279 (up 42.1%)
Her on top, facing away: 2,268 (up 34.7%)
Sitting up: 1,869 (up 24.4%)
Wheelbarrow: 1,436 (up 24.9%)
Flattened “doggy”: 1,176 (up 28.1%)
Spoons: 663 (up 9.6%)
Scissors: 580 (up 34.8%)

The top position for heterosexuals was missionary, with 5,646 carried out - a 51% rise since 2004.

"Doggy" style - continues to be the top position for homosexuals.

Less conventional positions, such as wheelbarrow, spoons and scissors, also showed a considerable rise in popularity in the last year.

Ms Lucky Streeter (not her real porn name), a consultant sex therapist and BARH president, said: "These figures appear to represent a growing acceptance of casual sex, particularly in diversifying positions and the number of homosexuals choosing to engage in one night stands."

Qualified advice

However, Ms Streeter stressed it was important that her members promoted responsible practices.

Concern has been growing about the number of people who opt for casual sex without using effective barrier methods of contraception.

...ok I wrote that article. It's is a spoof of an article on the BBC website about cosmetic surgery. Read the original here. Now bear in mind that you're much more likely to die from cosmetic surgery than from casual sex. Plus casual sex is much more likely to sort out your self esteem problem in my opinion! And yet my article sounds so irresponsible. Well I think it's totally irresponsible for the BBC not to mention the risks of surgery. One in 476 patients die. Yes DIE! And that's at reputable hospitals and clinics, it's loads worse at dodgy, overseas and unregulated places.

And that is my real "porn name" for those who play that game (it's the name of your first pet, then your mother/grandmother's maiden name!). Any yes, those are all genuine sexual positions, I guess I'll do what I have to in the name of research!

4 comments:

lost clown said...

*sheesh* I haven't even heard of some of those positions. Maybe I am "sex-negative"

*runs off to grab Good Vibrations Ultimate Guide to sex

Ahistoricality said...

Nice... but I'd note that the current Carnival of Feminists apparently didn't quite get the joke, because it's categorized under "Sex".

I think your point is very powerful, though. I recently read an article about a guy with 105 piercings and studs, mostly in his face. He'd had the same face for thirty years.... we are impatient and shallow at times, aren't we?

Cruella said...

Cheers, yes the grrrls at CoF have indeed n=missed the point. Still all publicity is good publicity isn't it?

James Cash said...
This comment has been removed by a blog administrator.