Christmas thank you list

I thought I would write my Christmas thank you list earlier this year. I was thinking about the how some of the most vilified people in our society actually are doing incredibly important work. So thank you to:

1) Health and safety inspectors. Yes some of us appreciate living in a society where children aren't allowed to be send up chimneys and scaffolding can't be made out of cheese. Is it getting in the way of your massive corporations mega-profits? Oh well maybe don't put your employees at risk then, no?

2) No-win, no fee lawyers. Legal aid is harder and harder to get hold of in this country and there's a recession on so less and less people can afford legal support when they've been injured or ripped off. If you've had a serious injury and are having difficulty getting back to work the financial distress can be huge. So if that injury was caused by negligence or dangerous behaviour you're entitled to get some compensation. If it's not a real case, judges can throw it out.

3) Chuggers - aka "charity muggers" the people who accost you in the street and ask you to sign up to charitable direct debit commitments. Yes, I know, I've sworn at them sometimes too, especially the animal charity ones! But the point remains - charities desperately need money. I'd much rather they were in the street than going door-to-door and waking me up. And regular direct debit donations are a much better way of funding charities, giving them long term funding and predictability of income. If you don't like being interrupted in the street or worry about the amount of your donation that might end up in the chugger's pocket (though they're entitled to earn a living too!) why not find a couple of good causes and sign up online now? How about Eaves Housing who support women who have been trafficked to the UK and Wateraid who build water and sanitation pipelines in the third world?

So thanks very much to those much-maligned people!

I've been super-busy the last few months both with the never-ending excitement about the Atheist Bitchslap and with a gruelling touring schedule for a variety of reasons. So I'm taking Christmas off now (though I will moderate comments, etc every couple of days) and leaving town for a little bit. My plan is not to perform while I'm away but if any blog/bitchslap fans are in L.A. and want to arrange a festive drinks night, please get in touch.

Happy Winterval all!!

Instant Karma!

Feel good about yourself right now, in your seat/pyjamas/office (delete as applicable, maybe all three). Mr Cru and I are running a 10k in aid of an ace charity that supports women in war-torn Congo (DRC). And you can sponsor me right here right now on this page! Think how good you'll feel when you've done it! And much much appreciated by me.

Bread and Circuses

So Guy Laliberte, the founder of Cirque du Soleil is going to go to the International Space Station as a space tourist. That I can live with. He's going to do a show about it too. Again I get it. What I don't get is the bit where he says he's doing it to raise awareness about the problems of access to clean water for people worldwide.

Is this the ultimate expression of the now exhausted theme of "going on holiday for charity"? In recent years the notion of people asking you to donate money so they can walk the Inca Trail or cycle the French Alps in aid of charity has become increasingly commonplace. And I'm always wondering exactly how much of the money is going to the charity and how much is paying for the trip.

But of course whatever the amount spent on grappling hooks and sun cream, if money is going to good causes that otherwise wouldn't you can't really knock it. But if it would raise more money to do something a little less close to the tropics, then at least admit that and don't go round acting like you've just grown a halo!

I should justify myself a bit here. I've done the London Marathon and the Caledonian Challenge for charity but in both cases I made a contribution myself to cover the cost of entry (not that much) and all that stuff so that money I got sponsored all went to the actual causes. Also in both cases I freely admit I was doing it because I wanted to and the only way I could get a place was to do it for charity.

We also have a fair few charity and fundraiser events at Soho Comedy Club and when we do we make sure that all the money goes to the causes. We don't charge for the room, the acts perform for free and flyerers and doorstaff always work for free those nights. In fact the only thing we can't recoup for the cause is the booking fee that PayPal charges (usually 9%). Annoyingly they have a function to reduce (but not eliminate) the fee for charities but you have to jump through hoops to get it and you have to be a fully registered charity, not just a good cause or an NGO, etc.

I don't want to sound like I'm against good causes and fundraising - I think it's vital and there should be more of it. But at the same time the word "charity" also doesn't mean "you can't criticise me". So when I read things like this dreadful story about topless models walking through Manchester in aid of "Support Our Soldiers" I totally don't get it. Why can't we support our soldiers without also supporting misogyny? And what about our female soldiers and our gay soldiers and our soldiers who for cultural or religious reasons don't approve of topless modelling?

This also goes for all the half naked calendars in aid of charity too - you know who you are. If you want to do something in aid of charity - do something positive.

Mr Laliberte's trip into space is costing £22m. I think that money would go a long way to giving people around the world access to clean water. Take a holiday if you want mate but don't just do something totally frivolous that you want to do and then pretend to me that you're doing this for the greater good. Believe me people dying from having to drink dirty water will not be looking up at the International Space Station going "thanks Guy"!